Tuesday, November 21, 2023

- November 21, 2023

I'm autistic. I do not have an official diagnosis yet. I am Autistic.

I have to find something but I have no idea where it could be. I become overwhelmed by all of the places it could be.

I believe in the freedom to believe or not believe...

Forcing anyone to believe is not them believing.

I'm Autistic. If there is something that I have that is not visible to me, like important paperwork, it does not exist until I remember it. I organize things in piles thinking I will remember the contents of each pile and be able to come back to it anytime I need it. I forget what is in these piles. It's not only piles but I have a few drawers on my desk and other places where I place items thinking I will remember where I placed said items but I always forget.

I sometimes come across things while looking for something and am surprised because I had forgotten about having that item.

I'm Autistic. It's a part of who I am. I have other things that are a part of who I am. I am Queer and nonbinary. I am Genderfluid and Genderqueer. It's complicated. I am also a writer, a filmmaker, an actor, and a photographer. I am these things. I am not trying to be these things. I am not interested in filmmaking, writing, acting, or photography because I want to be rich or famous. I am interested in the things I am interested in because these things make up who I am.

My friend brought by a tube of Hydrocortisone Cream for my rash.

I contacted a place I was told to go to about my rash but they require a valid ID. I do not have a valid ID. The person on the phone was rude and told me that I was being vague. Vague about what? I do not know if that is a place I should go to for medical attention if the person answering the phone refers to me as being vague. They could not understand that I did not have a valid ID.

I find it difficult to get to sleep and I keep waking up several times early each morning.

I feel like staying in bed each morning because I see no point in getting up.

Thanksgiving is on Thursday. I do not celebrate the Thanksgiving that some celebrate. I am not too fond of turkey. I like some of the food that people eat on this day but not everything.

I plan to watch the parade this year. I watched it before but not every year. Most holidays are just another day for me. My birthday included in those days that are just another day to me.

I want to sit down and write. I want to write on a regular basis but I am finding it difficult to find the motivation to write.

I am also finding it difficult to read on a regular basis like I would want. I find it difficult to focus and read something. I find it difficult to decide what to read.

I hope to work on these issues and begin reading and writing on a regular basis.

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Words, Floating: Poetry And Photography:

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