Tuesday, April 02, 2024
Tuesday, April 02, 2024
I met a guy named Pete or Peter. I am horrible with names. It was years ago. It was in California. We met several times. We kissed. I wrote poems for him. He did not want anything more because he thought it would damage his career as a dancer.
I liked him. I wanted a relationship.
Will I ever have a relationship?
The first time a guy finished in my mouth was with a guy I was attracted to, which improved the experience. I used my hand part of the time. I used my mouth when he finished. It was sour. I swallowed.
I do not know why I only sucked his cock and he finished one time. Neither one of us knew what we were doing at the time.
Religious people have so many secrets.
I met one older man online. I had met him before when I was a member of one of those Denominational churches.
We met a few times. He drove me to his house.
I sat on his sofa or couch, I'm uncertain which one.
I pulled my shorts down. He lowered down to his knees.
He sucked my cock each time we met.
I had spent time with him before, those years before in that church.
I was in the choir with him.
I was part of small groups with him.
Those years before I never imagined that someday he would suck my cock. It was not something I thought about concerning him.
I met him online after meeting him at another church, after not seeing him for years, and I met him on certain sites online.
I have no idea how he asked to meet me in person. I mean those times he would suck my cock.
I remember seeing him at that second church in between our times together.
I was in the choir at this church as well.
I was out at the second church.
I kept thinking that the people in this church who constantly judged me were unaware of this guy next to them who sucked my cock.
I had another older man who I thought was totally hetero message me about him sucking my cock. I met him at a singles group. I was the only single person in the group. The rest of the group were older divorced people.
You can never judge people by how they present themselves in certain environments.
Photographs of nude fit guys calm me. It excites me and calms me at the same time.
I remember the first time I saw photos of naked men.
I was a child. I found a stack of hetero porn.
I was very interested in the older men. I was fascinated by their cocks.
I have always enjoyed seeing photographs of cocks.
I am not interested in photographs of older men now. I prefer Twinks. Twinks are not the only ones I enjoy but I enjoy them the most.
I wake up in the same room,
same life or lack of it,
same cluttered room
with the same feelings I had
when I closed my eyes
last night...
<Continued On My Patreon>
I went to a few places today.
I had strange dreams but I no longer remember them.
I woke up a few times but remained in bed until afternoon.
I was tired.
I would like to have a boyfriend. I need a first career. I need a place to live.
I am uncertain what I will do the rest of the week...
<Continued on my Patreon>
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